Memories are photographs in the mind’s album. Some fresh and upfront while others hidden deep inside but able to come up on call. Every day we go on pasting new pictures, but most soon become pale, disintegrate and finally disappear altogether. A few remain, to become permanently etched. Which are those, the memories that become the deeply inscribed photographs? What are the criteria by which the mind selects as to what remains and what gets fizzled out into dust?
The photos that depict our achievements definitely belong to the first set - whatever it be that we consider as our ‘accomplishments’. The times when you did something for the very first time? – most probably yes. What about our passing of the conventional milestones in life – education, job, family functions, vacations? Yes, of course, but here we are in more slippery terrain. Some of these photographs may get themselves deleted, depending on how you value them as the years pass! Your great losses and disappointments remain fresh and more frequently upfront than you may like. Those times where you now wish you acted differently also never cease to pop up at times. Also the times when you were unfairly treated or denied something deserved – anything from a share in a snack to credit in a joint research paper or a promotion in job...
Think of the times in your life when the chips were most down, there was fire all around and you fought with your back pressed against the wall and then came out triumphant – aren’t these now the sweetest of memories? Victories always taste sweeter when a battle had to be fought before. The catchword is that finally you did come out – perhaps not unscathed – but as a winner. Those times when you could not too become pasted firmly in the album – although you wish they didn’t!
Aren’t there other memories that get permanently etched? Whenever you did something out of the ordinary. The times when you could be your own self, knew your real voice was being heard or felt deeply connected to nature and your environment. Instances when your life looked exactly the way you wanted. The times when you received an accolade which you knew you deserved, especially from someone whose judgement you respected. Any gift – it could even be the gift of a smile, a word, a nod or the warmth of a hand - which you knew was being given to the person that you are and not to a title or a role. Those become the golden memories which, on recall, never fail to warm your heart on a rainy day.
And of course, the frames that caught you making a difference, however small, to another’s life - even if nothing was said and you were not acknowledged - these too become your golden memories.
When we understand why or how some days shine, perhaps we can resolve consciously to create such days, can’t we? We also realise that we become the characters in others’ memories. We participate or contribute in creating the photographs they preserve in their albums of the mind. Therefore, just as we can choose to create our photographs, we can do for others too, right?
So why not make a date today? A date with memories. To craft a shining memory that will get pasted firmly into the album - your own, or someone else's
